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Joel Ross, Be Gay, 2008
(via cinnamon-lady24)
Trip the Light Fantastic
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I’m putting you out of your misery
Cause darling you’re dragging me down
I wish I could say that I’m sorry
But I’m over that, now I’m taking you out.
It’s a cruel, cruel world. (They/them)(Source: crydevilakira, via ifwewere-vampires)
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Terry Crews coming in with some wisdom
we need terry painting like bob ross on tv everyday
(via a-simplepairofpants)
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whyisthisfrenchguymasturbating:
demolished
Gottem!
i went to fact check this and he literally is
fuck them up philip
(Source: rafawriter, via leaveurcatswithme)
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(Source: naturaekos, via leaveurcatswithme)
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Anonymous: Did you ever go back to the Salt and Pepper diner?
at my show he told us about this!! and then he also said that he got arrested with the same friends he went to the salt and pepper diner with and they were all named john and the police officer had them all lined up on his car and he asked the first guys name and he said john and then he asked john mulaney and he said john and then the officer said “if you say your name is john youre all going to jail” and then he said his name is john and the officer lost his shit
(via a-simplepairofpants)
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Can you believe Clifford the big red dog and Biscuit are Jewish? Icons.
Why are all these dogs Jewish?
Because I said so
You guys are forgeting Jake!
(Source: soloveitchik, via a-simplepairofpants)
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Small town culture is knowing that there are Old Folks with strange nicknames but never knowing the stories behind them.
Of course, I made the mistake of asking why everyone calls this one guy Brickaday and it turns out that he worked at a brickyard for 40 years, stealing exactly one brick every day and making no particular efforts to conceal the theft. Nobody thought anything of it until years later he was discovered to have built three houses.
His boss is said to have shrugged and made some remarks about the importance of coming up with a plan and sticking to it.
I‘m trying to arrange my face into an appropriate approximation of silent bafflement and failing miserably.
i appreciate brickaday
chaotic good
My grandpa once told me he worked with a guy called Scrappy at General Motors back in the 50s. Every few days he would wheelbarrow out metal shavings and the foreman was convinced he was stealing things and hiding them in the scrap metal to get it out of the factory. But every time they’d go through the scrap they’d find nothing. He was stealing the wheelbarrows.
One of my late grandfather’s friends was called Salami because he used to steal salami and cured meats so I’m seeing a pattern here
Direct Action
(Source: sharpnelshell, via writeroost)
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